Why Life In A Big City May Not Be For You

How many of you have thought about visiting London, Paris, or New York at least once before you die? How many of you want to move to these cities permanently and live like a character from a Hollywood movie? Maybe specifically not these cities but other big cities around you? Have you ever questioned why?

Why do you want to move to a bigger city?

Perhaps you think that life is marginally better in big cities. Watch any popular movie and it’s probably set in a big city. The protagonist lives their best life, they have a glamorous job, they wear the best clothes, and have the coolest friends. And maybe you want that life too.

We all want to be the main character of our stories, and bigger cities give us an option to do that. It is exactly why these cities are attracting more and more young people. Sometimes it’s because there are more job opportunities, and sometimes it’s because people want to live a more vibrant life. You have easy access to almost everything.

We don’t want to miss the fun, we want to be a part of every party. We want to dine at the best restaurants, we want to dance in the best clubs. Just like all our favorite celebrities and influencers.

We are constantly told that our 20s are the most important years of our lives and if we are not having fun right now, we are wasting our lives. This puts pressure on us to move to bigger cities and enjoy ourselves. We sometimes move to these cities simply because of peer pressure.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to live a better life. But when we are fantasizing about finding happiness somewhere far away from us, we often forget about what’s right there in front of us.

Don’t worry, this is not your fault. We all have been there.

Status symbol

Having a successful life in a bigger city is seen as a symbol of wealth in many cultures. Making it in a big city is difficult and those who do that must be somehow more intelligent and hard-working than others, right?

Lately, with the rise of platforms like Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube, the problem of gentrification has become more serious. This is one of the reasons why there has been an influx of these young influencers in big cities.

Merriam Webster defines gentrification as “a process in which a poor area (as of a city) experiences an influx of middle-class or wealthy people who renovate and rebuild homes and businesses and which often results in an increase in property values and the displacement of earlier, usually poorer residents.”

Being able to live in a big city gives you more followers and likes. Go take a look at your favorite influencer’s Instagram profile and chances are they are partying in some big city. The city that they live in becomes a big part of who they are. They get sponsorships based on where they live. Finding affordable cafes isn’t about saving money for them, it’s about making viral content for their audience.

The rent prices and other expenses are rising continuously in big cities because of this, and it’s becoming more difficult for less privileged people to survive in such spaces. People with less wealth are being forced out of cities they have spent their whole lives in because they can no longer afford to live there.

(Also read: 5 Benefits Of Learning A New Language)

Reel life is not real life

Hollywood is probably one of the reasons why we romanticize big cities. But Hollywood isn’t realistic. You may have just watched Notting Hill and you want to fall in love with a librarian in London, but if we are being honest, it’s very difficult for a young librarian to rent a flat like that in London now.

Carrie from Sex and the City wrote one article per week and lived in one of the most expensive areas in the world. Do you think you can afford to live in an area like that while writing one article per week?

I can go on and on and talk about shows like Emily in Paris, F.R.I.E.N.D.S., and more but you get my point.

The positives and the negatives

Of course, living in a big city has numerous benefits. More job opportunities, more opportunities to make friends and date, more concerts to attend. If you’re a minority, you will find it more comforting to live in a bigger city as they are more diverse and you can live there anonymously.

The global pandemic has changed a lot.

In the past few years, I have had the privilege of visiting and working in some of the best cities in the world. London, Paris, Berlin, and more. I have lived in a big city my whole life. And while I was hoping to be the main character of my own story, I realized that I didn’t need to move somewhere far away just to seek happiness.

Living in a big city took a toll on my mental health. I was spending hours on the commute to go anywhere, and the noise and the pollution weren’t good for me physically. I craved the sense of community that comes with living in a smaller city.

When I moved to a smaller city, I became familiar with faces and places easily. I learned to love peace and quiet. I found who I really am in the absence of noise. Personally, I am much happier in a smaller city and now that everything is online, I have been able to access everything that I want.

(Also read: The Law of Attraction: How To Manifest Anything You Want!)

The Digital World

Ever since this pandemic wreaked havoc upon our lives, most services have become accessible online. Many companies have announced options to work from home for an indefinite period of time.

As long as you have a laptop with a stable connection, you can be anywhere in the world. So, why would you spend more than half your paycheck on rent when you can live somewhere much cheaper?

You don’t even have to move far away from a big city. Most big cities are surrounded by smaller cities that are only an hour or so away by public transport. You can still access a vibrant life from these smaller cities without paying the expenses of bigger cities.


If you want to move somewhere far away because you’re not happy, perhaps it would be better to analyze why and then work on that problem. Maybe you live in an abusive household and are seeking safety, then you should definitely get away.

But if you want to move away simply because you want to post pretty pictures on Instagram, then I suggest you try to find beauty exactly where you are.

I don’t want you to stop seeking happiness, nor am I asking you to stop seeking a better life. What I am asking you to do is understand what really makes you happy. Don’t look at someone’s life on social media and decide living like them will make you happy too. Figure yourself out.

What are your dreams? What do you want to do with your life?

Life is not perfect anywhere. You may find exactly what you’re looking for in a big city or in a small city. Just make the most of your life no matter where you are. Keep exploring and one day you’ll find everything you are looking for.


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Hi there! I am Vidhipssa. I will help you begin your journey toward embracing the true joys of life.